How to regulate and control your emotions

How to regulate and control your emotions ?

怎样调节、控制自己的情绪 

There is impossible that someone will always be in a good mood , there is circumstances in life , we face up and downs. Therefore , by accidentally we will portrait negative emotion to the others.

A mature person ,does not live without negative emotions, but they are good at regulating their emotions and control . The growing teenagers must learn to adjust and control their emotions. This doesn't mean that you have to suppress your negative emotions.

Psychological research shows that " repression " does not change the negative emotions , but to make them in our hearts deposited. When they accumulated to a certain extent , they tend to erupt in destructive ways , to themselves and others harm. For example, we often see some " good-natured " people, sometimes suddenly angry, make some people surprised, or let him regret the things themselves , the results which often is usually repressed .

Meanwhile repression will result in deeper inner conflict , leading to mental illness.

There is two types of negative feeling : Acute & Chronic.

Due to external stimuli and impulsive angry, make all kinds of irrational behavior , can be said to be acute in a bad mood . Common approach to deal with this emotion is a bad time to give your own hints and warnings. For example, when you feel the anger rising when in said to myself : restraint , restraint again ! Or silently count from one to ten. Often only a few seconds , tens of seconds , your mind will be able to calm down , then go to deal with the problem , it would not do to make their regret things. 

Chronic bad mood , often by a number of things go wrong in life caused . Causes bad mood may not look to eliminate , but long stuck in a bad mood , does not change the status quo , often will make the situation worse . If we are able to adjust their own , so to get rid of negative emotions control , we have the strength to face the unpleasant reality of their own . When felt depressed mood or depressed , they can use distraction methods to change it, for example, go for a walk , listening to music, playing baseball , or browse the shops ; also to intimate friends crying about.

Psychological research shows that crying there is a " therapeutic " function, who wept after , often the mood became much better, so you do not have to be ashamed to cry . You can also write a diary , or make a counseling hotline , so that their bad mood to vent out . In addition to catharsis, if you are able to change their situation and go do something , or in the face of adversity as a driving force in life to work hard , it will better help you to get out from negative emotions, because on the one hand the process of doing things We need to focus attention , so you do not have time to go self-pity ; on the other hand , in your situation improved in the process, your vision will become more open , which may cause you to generate a new outlook on life .

人不可能永远处在好情绪之中，生活中既然有挫折、有烦恼，就会有消极的情绪。

一个心理成熟的人，不是没有消极情绪的人，而是善于调节和控制自己情绪的人。青少年在成长的过程中，也要慢慢学会学会调节和控制自己的情绪。这并不是说要压抑自己的消极情绪。

心理学研究表明，"压抑"并不能改变消极的情绪，反而使它们在内心深处沉积下来。当它们积累到一定程度时，往往会以破坏性的方式爆发出来，给自己和他人造成伤害。比如我们常会看到一些"好脾气"的人，有时会突然发火，做出一些使人吃惊，或者让他自己也后悔的事来，这往往就是平时压抑的结果。

同时压抑还会造成更深的内心冲突，导致心理疾病。 

我们可以把坏情绪分为急性的和慢性的两种。

因受到外界刺激而冲动发火，做出种种不理智的行为，可以说是急性的坏情绪。对付这种坏情绪常用的方法是，及时给予自己暗示和警告。如当你感到怒气正在上升时，在心里对自己说：克制，再克制！或者默默地从一数到十。往往只需几秒钟、几十秒钟，你的心绪就能够平静下来，那时再去处理问题，就不会做出使自己后悔的事了。 

慢性的坏情绪，往往是由生活中许多不如意的事情造成的。造成坏情绪的原因也许不能一下消除，但长期陷在坏情绪之中，并不能改变现状，往往还会使情况变得更坏。如果我们能够调整自己，使自己摆脱消极情绪的控制，就有力量来面对不如意的现实。当感到自己情绪消沉或者沮丧的时候，可以用转移注意力的方法改变它，比如出去散散步，听听音乐，打打球，或是逛逛商店；也可以向知心的朋友哭诉一下。

心理学研究表明，哭泣有一种"治疗"的功能，人在痛哭一场后，往往心情就变得好多了，因此你不必为哭泣而害羞。你也可以写日记，或打个心理咨询热线，让自己的坏情绪宣泄出来。除了宣泄以外，如果你能够为改变自己的处境而去做些事情，或者以逆境为人生的动力去努力奋斗，就会更好地帮你从消极的情绪中摆脱出来，因为一方面做事的过程需要集中注意力，让你没时间去自怨自艾；另一方面，在你的处境得到改善的过程中，你的眼界会变得更开阔，从而可能使你对生活产生新的看法。